Saying NO literally used to hurt.
"My head said NO, but my mouth said YES!"
A client once said this to me, and I just felt it in my bones.
There was a time when saying NO actually hurt my body—I'd feel this visceral gut clenching and my neck would tighten at even the thought of saying no to key people in my life.
If you've ever identified as a people pleaser or perfectionist, you probably know this feeling. Many of us learned early on that saying YES was how we stayed connected, felt loved, and earned those gold stars. And honestly? It feels good to help someone.
But there’s a sad truth about ALWAYS being the one who says YES to others. It often means we’re inadvertently saying NO to ourselves.
You deserve a more balanced way of living—one where you show up for yourself as much as you show up for everyone else.
The good news? It can start really small. Like, really small.
Here are 10 tiny ways to practice saying NO:
Decline a social invite that just doesn't align.
Say no to complicated end-of-year teachers' gifts.
Silence or leave a group chat that drains your energy.
Say a loving no to a kid's random request that you buy something.
Say no to watching another episode in favor of keeping your bedtime.
Unfollow someone on social media who you tend to compare yourself to.
Say no to a food or drink that makes you feel terrible.
Say no to hosting something you don't really want to host.
Refrain from scrolling media or checking your email when you first wake up.
Say no to buying something just because it's on sale.
What other simple, safe ways you can practice saying NO this week?
If you're realizing that saying NO feels impossible because your nervous system literally won't let you, let's talk.
I work with high-achieving women who've tried all the boundary-setting advice but still feel that gut-clenching resistance.
Book a free 30-minute call here and let's explore what might be getting in your way.
Warmly,
Lisa