What dying can tell us about how to live

My 2024 hope for you is that you’re fully content with the life you are living.

I know this time of year can feel so exciting, fresh and full of fun opportunities.

However, I want to get real with you.

During the height of the pandemic and lock downs, I really hoped we’d emerge more thoughtful and purposeful… intentionally choosing how we spend our time and energy, rather than running around like chickens without heads.

I thought we’d learn that no amount of external accolades or social media reactions could compare to the internal peace that comes with living a life on our terms.

While you no doubt have lovely days ahead of you, filled with grace and purpose… your days are numbered.

At the end of the day, when you’re on your deathbed, I want you to look back on the years you had, and feel a deep sense peace with how you spent your time and energy.

Most of us aren’t there yet.

Are you satisfied with the life you’re living now, so that at the end of the day, you’ll be completely content?

Let’s do a little experiment.

Be honest and answer these questions for yourself.

“Am I being true to myself, or am I living my life on autopilot?”

“Am I satisfied with the amount of work I’m doing, or am I sucked dry by it?”

“Am I expressing my feelings or suppressing them?”

“Am I connecting with the important people in my life, or am I disconnected?”

“Am I happy now or am I waiting to be happy after (you name the thing)?”

Bronnie Ware, a hospice nurse, asked the dying what they regretted most.

While it was too late for her patients, their answers can tell us about how we should be living while we still have the chance.

Here are the top five regrets of the dying, according to her research:

  1. I wish I had the courage to live a life true to myself, not the life others expected of me.

  2. I wish I hadn't worked so hard.

  3. I wish I had the courage to express my feelings.

  4. I wish I had stayed in touch with my friends.

  5. I wish that I had let myself be happier.

OOOFF!

Because you were honest in answering the questions above, I’ll be honest with YOU.

If my time on earth would have ended 20 years ago, I would have died with those same regrets.

The only reason I’m living relatively regret free now, is that I chose to adjust my approach to life.

Small, incremental tweaks in my autopilot life, created a life I now love.

As I see it, the stakes have never been higher.

Getting back to the hospice survey, here’s one more question I’d ask the dying:

“Knowing what you know now, which would you choose… to live life by default or life by design?”

Maybe you’re now at a place where you’re interested in living a life of few regrets, but you’re not sure where to start.

On Friday, January 29th, I’m hosting an Invite Only, half day Life Design Retreat.

I’d love to talk with you, if taking a half day and planning your next quarter and creating accountability around your goals is appealing to you.

I truly believe no matter how busy you are, you deserve to live a life on your terms.

Because at the end of the day, when it’s just you and your God, my wish for you is that you can say, "I had a good life. I had a plan to prosper in spite of the pitfalls. And I spent my time and energy on the things and the people that mattered most to me. I’m all good.”

Here’s to you, and that good life you’re creating,

Lisa

P.S. If you want to talk about the upcoming Life Design Retreat, just email me at lisa@livingfullybalanced.com, and let's schedule a time chat.